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I think people should stay home and not go outside during pandemic  for many reasons.For example in the text it says that (should I go out for a hair cut?).This means that they are  making a decision whether  they should go or not.Also,in the text it says that (during the coved-19 pandemic  carry implication for personal and Public health ,in some cases life  or death).This means that people are going to places where people are not wearing face masks and getting sick.In conclusion this is why it issue to stay home.
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<br> '''Original Article'''<br />
 
<br> '''Original Article'''<br />
 
<br> Captain Crewe and Sara show their love in many ways. Captain crewe said he would give anything that Sara wanted.For example in the text says Captain Crewe was a rash, innocent young man and wanted his little girl to have everything she admired.This shows that Captain Crew really cares about Sara.Also captain Crew did a lot of things for Sara.This is another reason.In conclusion this is why I think Captain crew and Sara show their love in many ways.<br />
 
<br> Captain Crewe and Sara show their love in many ways. Captain crewe said he would give anything that Sara wanted.For example in the text says Captain Crewe was a rash, innocent young man and wanted his little girl to have everything she admired.This shows that Captain Crew really cares about Sara.Also captain Crew did a lot of things for Sara.This is another reason.In conclusion this is why I think Captain crew and Sara show their love in many ways.<br />

Revision as of 00:15, 30 July 2020

I think people should stay home and not go outside during pandemic for many reasons.For example in the text it says that (should I go out for a hair cut?).This means that they are making a decision whether they should go or not.Also,in the text it says that (during the coved-19 pandemic carry implication for personal and Public health ,in some cases life or death).This means that people are going to places where people are not wearing face masks and getting sick.In conclusion this is why it issue to stay home.






Original Article

Captain Crewe and Sara show their love in many ways. Captain crewe said he would give anything that Sara wanted.For example in the text says Captain Crewe was a rash, innocent young man and wanted his little girl to have everything she admired.This shows that Captain Crew really cares about Sara.Also captain Crew did a lot of things for Sara.This is another reason.In conclusion this is why I think Captain crew and Sara show their love in many ways.

The Edits

Captain Crewe and Sara show their love in many ways.

***Good!

Captain crewe said he would give anything that Sara wanted.

***Crewe should be capitalized. Let's change this sentence a tiny bit: Captain Crewe said he would give Sara anything she wanted.

For example in the text says Captain Crewe was a rash, innocent young man and wanted his little girl to have everything she admired.

***This sentence is very good, but we have to add in a few things. First, there should be a comma after "For example". Then, it should be "in the text it says" (you just forgot the word "it"). Lastly, we need quotation marks for the quote. Edited sentence: For example, in the text it says that Captain Crewe was a "rash, innocent young man and wanted his little girl to have everything she admired."

This shows that Captain Crew really cares about Sara.

***Good! But don't forget to hit the space bar before you start a new sentence.

Also captain Crew did a lot of things for Sara.

***I want to combine this sentence with the next one. It might look something like: Another reason is that Captain Crewe did a lot of things for Sara.

In conclusion this is why I think Captain crew and Sara show their love in many ways.

***In formal/argumentative writing, you want to avoid the phrase "I think" as it makes you sound unsure in proving your point. Let's try: In conclusion, Captain Crewe and Sara show their love in many ways.

Final Edits

Captain Crewe and Sara show their love in many ways. Captain Crewe said he would give Sara anything she wanted. For example, in the text it says that Captain Crewe was a "rash, innocent young man and wanted his little girl to have everything she admired." This shows that Captain Crew really cares about Sara. Another reason is that Captain Crewe did a lot of things for Sara. In conclusion, Captain Crewe and Sara show their love in many ways.

Edited by Kelli Hoeppner




Original Article

Based on the story i think that Demi is a nice guy for many reasons..For example in the text it says that (Demi is one of the children who show painful the effect of intellegent love and care).This shows that demi is a nice guy.Another reason is in the text it says that (he was unusuallybright and beautiful).this is another reason why demi is nice.In conclusion this is why i think Demi is nice.

The Edits

Based on the story i think that Demi is a nice guy for many reasons..

***This sentence is overall really good, but we have to fix a few things. We're going to need a comma after "story" and "i" always needs to be capitalized. Furthermore, we need to get rid of the extra space between "that" and "Demi", and there should only be one period at the end of the sentence. Lastly, we should omit "I think" because this is phrase you typically want to avoid in formal writing. With that being said, your new sentence could look like: The story shows that Demi is a nice guy for many reasons.

For example in the text it says that (Demi is one of the children who show painful the effect of intellegent love and care).

***The beginning of this sentence looks great! We could make it even simpler by saying "For example, the texts says that" Also, let's make sure put a comma after "example". When you quote from the text, you want to use quotation marks, not parentheses. Lastly, the quote doesn't make much sense. I think you might have misplaced the word "painful"; it would sound better before the word "effect". It still doesn't make sense when you read the sentence together, but you might have just quoted it incorrectly. My final correction is that "intellegent" is spelled as "intelligent."

This shows that demi is a nice guy.

***This works! I have a few corrections: make sure you hit the space button before you start another sentence and names should always be capitalized ("demi"should be "Demi").

Another reason is in the text it says that (he was unusuallybright and beautiful).

***Beginning of the sentence looks good. We need quotation marks for the quote and separate "unusually" and "bright".

this is another reason why demi is nice.

***Good! Just two corrections: hit the space key before you start another sentence and Demi needs to be capitalized.

In conclusion this is why i think Demi is nice.

***Like I said before, try to avoid using the phrase "I think" in formal writing. Let's try: In conclusion, the text shows that Demi is nice for several reasons.

Final Edits

The story shows that Demi is a nice guy for many reasons. For example, the texts says that "Demi is one of the children who show the painful effect of intelligent love and care." This shows that Demi is a nice guy. Another reason is in the text it says that "He was unusually bright and beautiful". This is another reason why Demi is nice. In conclusion, the text shows that Demi is nice for several reasons.

Edited by Kelli Hoeppner


Original Article

when Mrs.Bhaer said (Right teddy is right :there's something in that kid she can mean many things for many reasons.For example the kid was mourning for his violet.In the text says that (Mourining for his dead father,and his lost violet.)This is one reason Mrs.Bhaer said that about that kid.Also I think the kid did weird things.This maybe be one reason that Mrs.Bhaer said that kid was different.In conclusion this is some reason why Mrs.Bhaer might have said the kid was different.

The Edits

when Mrs.Bhaer said (Right teddy is right :there's something in that kid she can mean many things for many reasons.

***Make sure to capitalize the first letter of the first word at the beginning of the sentence! Also, it appears you are quoting Mrs. Bhaer from the text. For quotes we need quotation marks, not parentheses. I'm not exactly sure what the quote is or where it ends, but I'd imagine your new sentence as: When Mrs. Bhaer said: "Teddy is right, there's something in that kid" she means several things.

For example the kid was mourning for his violet.

***We need a comma after "For example". Also, make sure to use a space after each period, before you write your next sentence.

In the text says that (Mourining for his dead father,and his lost violet.)

***Again, we need quotation marks for a quote, not parentheses. "Mourining" should be spelled as "Mourning" and there needs to be a space between the comma and "and". I want to note that this quote sounds incomplete, so, we need to use our own words to complete the quote. Let's try: In the text it says that he was "mourning for his dead father" and that he "lost his violet."

This is one reason Mrs.Bhaer said that about that kid.

***Let's be more specific with what Mrs. Bhaer said. We could say: This is one reason Mrs. Bhaer said that there was something wrong with the kid.

Also I think the kid did weird things.

***In formal writing, we want to be confident in what we say; with that being said, avoid saying phrases such as "I think." If we delete this phrase, this is what our new sentence will be: Also, the kid did weird things.

This maybe be one reason that Mrs.Bhaer said that kid was different.

***You've already presented another reason as to why Mrs.Bhaer said the things she did. So, we want to say: This is another reason that Mrs.Bhaer said that the kid was different.

In conclusion this is some reason why Mrs.Bhaer might have said the kid was different.

***You're referring to a plural noun when you say "reasons", so we need the word "these" instead of "this". Also, this sentences sound repetitive compared to the last sentence. Let's change this sentence for word choice: In conclusion, these are the reasons as to why Mrs.Bhaer said that the kid was strange.

Final Edits

When Mrs. Bhaer said: "Teddy is right, there's something in that kid" she means several things. For example, the kid was mourning for his violet. In the text it says that he was "mourning for his dead father" and that he "lost his violet." This is one reason Mrs. Bhaer said that there was something wrong with the kid. Also, the kid did weird things. This is another reason that Mrs.Bhaer said that the kid was different. In conclusion, these are the reasons as to why Mrs.Bhaer said that the kid was strange.

Edited by Kelli Hoeppner


Original Article

Within the story the expert can be described in many ways.People should always remembering the way of greeting people.For example in the text it says that "what's your name" Nat Blake"."mines Tommy Bangs". come up and have a go ,will ya.".This means that Tommy is being nice to nat by showing around the place.In conclusion these are some ways within the story the exert can be described in many ways.


The Edits:

Within the story the expert can be described in many ways.

*** I think you mean "excerpt" instead of "expert." In that case, it might make more sense to say "The excerpt within the story can be described in many ways." Also, make sure to add a space after the period (before you start your next sentence).

People should always remembering the way of greeting people.

*** The present participle of remember (remembering) does not work in this sentence. Let's try: People should always remember the ways of greeting other people. You also need to add that space I mentioned before ; after the period, before you write your next sentence.

For example in the text it says that "what's your name" Nat Blake"."mines Tommy Bangs". come up and have a go ,will ya."

*** There's a lot going on in this sentence and there's punctuation that's missing/has been misplaced. Also, we want it to be clear who is talking. So, we could say: Tommy Bangs asks, "what's your name?", with which Nat Blake replies "Nat Blake", "come up and have a go, will ya?" asks Tommy Bangs. We can leave out Tommy's introduction of himself because the main illustration of Tommy's kindness is him asking to show Nat around the place. Let's try to change the beginning of the sentence as well. We can just say, "The text shows the importance of greeting people in a conversation between Nat Blake and Tommy Bangs:" Therefore, the sentence altogether would be: "The text shows the importance of greeting people in a conversation between Nat Blake and Tommy Bangs: Tommy Bangs asks, "what's your name?", with which Nat Blake replies "Nat Blake", "come up and have a go, will ya?" asks Tommy Bangs."

This means that Tommy is being nice to nat by showing around the place.

*** This is pretty good! We need to capitalize the name Nat. Also, let's make a slight change to the beginning of the sentence: "This example shows" instead of "This means that". That way, we are referring to what the example is showing us when it comes to polite greetings. The new sentence would look like: This example shows that Tommy is being nice to Nat by showing him around the place.

In conclusion these are some ways within the story the exert can be described in many ways.

*** This is a pretty good sentence overall. We need a comma after "In conclusion" and the word "excerpt" is misspelled. Also, let's consider deleting "there are some ways" because it sounds repetitive when reading the sentence altogether. Let's try: In conclusion, the excerpt within the story can be described in many ways.

Final Edit:
The excerpt within the story can be described in many ways. People should always remember the ways of greeting other people. The text shows the importance of greeting people in a conversation between Nat Blake and Tommy Bangs: Tommy Bangs asks, "what's your name?", with which Nat Blake replies "Nat Blake", "come up and have a go, will ya?" asks Tommy Bangs. This example shows that Tommy is being nice to Nat by showing him around the place. In conclusion, the excerpt within the story can be described in many ways.

Edited by Kelli Hoeppner


Original Article

There are many reason that made Ali Baba hide his finding's. Ali baba dug a hole where he hid his findings. For example in the text it says that (I will dig a hole to hide my findings).This means Ali baba doesn't want anyone to know what is in there and to get it.Another reason is if the robbers found out about the golds the robbers would have killed Ali Baba .this shows that he hid the findings because if the robbers found out he would have killed Ali Baba.In conclusion this is why Ali Baba had to hide his findings.


The Edits:

There are many reason that made Ali Baba hide his finding's.

***We need the plural version of "reason" (reasons) because you are saying that there is more than one reason that Ali Baba hides his findings. Also, the word "finding" does not need the possessive apostrophe; it's just "findings".

Ali baba dug a hole where he hid his findings.

***Good. Make sure Baba is capitalized.

For example in the text it says that (I will dig a hole to hide my findings).

***Since this a direct quote from the text, we need quotation marks. Also, since this a quote from Ali himself, we want to be sure we indicate that; instead of "in the text it says that" we would say "in the text Ali Baba says." We also need a comma after "For example." All in all, the sentence would look like: For example, in the text Ali Baba says: "I will dig a hole to hide my findings." Note that I added a colon before the quotation. When quoting from a text, we need to use either a comma or a colon. Use a comma before a quotation of 6 words or fewer. Use a colon before a quotation of more than 6 words.

This means Ali baba doesn't want anyone to know what is in there and to get it.

***Baba needs to be capitalized. This sentence is good, but let's change a few things. Let's change "means" to "shows" because Baba's quotation about hiding his findings shows the audience that he doesn't want anyone to know where they are. When you say "get it", I'm assuming you mean stealing. With that being said, let's be specific and say "steal" instead of "get." Altogether, the sentence might be: "This shows that Ali Baba doesn't want anyone to know where his findings are so that they can be stolen."

Another reason is if the robbers found out about the golds the robbers would have killed Ali Baba .

***You don't need to say "the robbers" twice. We can add a comma after "the golds" and say "they" instead of "the robbers." There is also an extra space between Baba and the period at the end the sentence. Also, "gold" doesn't need to be plural, so take the "s" out of "golds".

***In conclusion this is why Ali Baba had to hide his findings.

This is good! We could could probably be more specific, but I think this is a good conclusion. Don't forget to add a comma after "In conclusion."

Final Edit:

There are many reasons that made Ali Baba hide his findings. Ali Baba dug a hole where he hid he findings. For example, in the text Ali Baba says: "I will dig a hole to hide my findings." This shows that Ali Baba doesn't want anyone to know where his findings are so that they can be stolen. Another reason is that if robbers found about the gold, they would have killed Ali Baba. In conclusion, this is why Ali Baba had to hide his findings.

Edited by Kelli Hoeppner

The protagonist and the antagonist can be anyone for many reasons.For example in the text says the raindeer  told her all about gerdas story after having first told his own, which seem to him the most important.This shows that gerda is the protagonist of this story.The antagonist of this story is the  lapland women for many reasons.For example in the text it says that oh you poor things lapland women said ,you have a long way to go yet .This shows that lapland is the antagonist in this story.In conclusion the is the protagonist in the story and the antagonist in the story.


The protagonist and the antagonist can be anyone for many reasons.

*** This sentence is good, but add a space after each sentence.

For example in the text says the raindeer told her all about gerdas story after having first told his own, which seem to him the most important.

*** Remove “in.” The word “raindeer” should be spelled as “reindeer.” Capitalize “gerda” since that is the name of a character. Add an apostrophe before the “s” in “gerdas.” When using sentences or quotes from the text, add a quotation mark (“) at the start of a quote from the text and add another quotation mark at the end of a quote. Make sure quotes are written exactly as they are in the text.

Edited sentence: For example the text says, “The reindeer told her all about Gerda’s story, after having first told his own, which seemed to him the most important.”

This shows that gerda is the protagonist of this story.

*** Capitalize “gerda” since that is the name of a character.

Edited sentence: This shows that Gerda is the protagonist of this story.

The antagonist of this story is the lapland women for many reasons.

*** Write “lapland women” as “Lapland woman.” The word “women” refers to more than one woman, but the Lapland woman is only one woman. Capitalize “lapland” since that is the name of a place. Remove the extra space before “Lapland.”

Edited sentence: The antagonist of this story is the Lapland woman for many reasons.

For example in the text it says that oh you poor things lapland women said ,you have a long way to go yet .

*** Write “lapland women” as “Lapland woman.” When using sentences or quotes from the text, add a quotation mark (“) at the start of a quote from the text and add another quotation mark at the end of a quote. When a person speaks inside of a quote, add a single quotation mark (‘) around what they say. Make sure quotes are written exactly as they are in the text. Remove “that.”

Edited sentence: For example in the text it says, “‘Oh, you poor things,’ said the Lapland woman, ‘you have a long way to go yet.’”

This shows that lapland is the antagonist in this story.

*** Write out “the Lapland woman.” Write “lapland women” as “Lapland woman.”

Edited sentence: This shows that the Lapland woman is the antagonist in this story.

In conclusion the is the protagonist in the story and the antagonist in the story.

*** Add the names of the characters.

Edited sentence: In conclusion, Gerda is the protagonist in the story and the Lapland woman is the antagonist in the story.

*** Capitalize the first letter in the names of characters and the names of places. Remember to add a space after each sentence. When using sentences or quotes from the text, add a quotation mark (“) at the start of a quote from the text and add another quotation mark at the end of a quote. Make sure quotes are written exactly as they are in the text.

Edited paragraph:

The protagonist and the antagonist can be anyone for many reasons. For example the text says, “The reindeer told her all about Gerda’s story, after having first told his own, which seemed to him the most important.” This shows that Gerda is the protagonist of this story. The antagonist of this story is the Lapland woman for many reasons. For example in the text it says, “‘Oh, you poor things,’ said the Lapland woman, ‘you have a long way to go yet.’” This shows that the Lapland woman is the antagonist in this story. In conclusion, Gerda is the protagonist in the story and the Lapland woman is the antagonist in the story.

Edited by Penny Yagake






You can celebrate earth day in many ways for many reasons.U can keep the car in the garage.For example I found this information.This shows if you keep your car in the garage on earth day you are celebrating it.Also you can unplug the tv.This shows celebrating earth day because you are saving energy instead of wasting.


You can celebrate earth day in many ways for many reasons.

*** Capitalize “Earth Day.” Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Here, replace “You” with “People.”

Edited sentence: People can celebrate Earth Day in many ways for many reasons.

U can keep the car in the garage.

*** “U” should be spelled out as “you.” However, avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Here, replace “You” with “A person.”

Edited sentence: A person can keep their car in the garage.

For example I found this information.

*** Where can the reader find this information? Avoid first person point of view (“I”) and use third person point of view only.

Edited sentence: For example this information can be found on the Internet.

This shows if you keep your car in the garage on earth day you are celebrating it.

*** Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Capitalize “Earth Day.”

Edited sentence: This shows if a person keeps their car in the garage on Earth Day they are celebrating it.

Also you can unplug the tv.

*** Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Capitalize “TV.”

Edited sentence: Also a person can unplug their TV.

This shows celebrating earth day because you are saving energy instead of wasting.

*** Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Here, change “you” to “they.” Capitalize “Earth Day.” Add “they are” before “celebrating.” Add “it” after “wasting.”

Edited sentence: This shows they are celebrating Earth Day because they are saving energy instead of wasting it.

*** Make sure there is a space between each sentence. Capitalize the names of days like “Earth Day” and words like “TV.” Spell out words like “you” completely. Avoid first person point of view (“I”) and second person point of view (“you”). Use third person point of view only.

Edited paragraph:

People can celebrate Earth Day in many ways for many reasons. A person can keep their car in the garage. For example this information can be found on the Internet. This shows if a person keeps their car in the garage on Earth Day they are celebrating it. Also a person can unplug their TV. This shows they are celebrating Earth Day because they are saving energy instead of wasting it.

Edited by Penny Yagake






There are many requirements to become A astronaut for many reasons.You have to be A U.S. citizenship.For examle I got the imformation from internet. This means if you want to be A astronaut you have to be a U.S. citizenship.Also if you want to be A astronaut you have to study hard.For example ,you have to be A bacheler's degree in engineering ,biological sciences,physical science or mathematics from an accredited college or university.This shows that you havemtoi study really hard and study a lot to become astronaut.


There are many requirements to become A astronaut for many reasons.

*** Change “A astronaut” to “an astronaut.” An “an” comes before words that start with a vowel sound. An “a” comes before words that start with a consonant sound.

Edited sentence: There are many requirements to become an astronaut for many reasons.

You have to be A U.S. citizenship.

*** “A” does not need to be capitalized in every sentence unless it is at the beginning of a sentence. Change “citizenship” to “citizen.” Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Here, change “You” to “a person.”

Edited sentence: A person has to be a U.S. citizen.

For examle I got the imformation from internet.

*** “examle” should be spelled as “example” and “imformation” should be spelled as “information.” Add “the” before “internet.” Avoid first person point of view (“I”) and use third person point of view only.

Edited sentence: For example, this information is from the internet.

This means if you want to be A astronaut you have to be a U.S. citizenship.

*** Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Replace “you” with pronouns like “a person” or “they.” Change “citizenship” to “citizen.” Change “A astronaut” to “an astronaut.”

Edited sentence: This means if a person wants to be an astronaut they have to be a U.S. citizen.

Also if you want to be A astronaut you have to study hard.

*** Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Replace “you” with pronouns like “a person” or “they.” Change “A astronaut” to “an astronaut.”

Edited sentence: Also if a person wants to be an astronaut they have to study hard.

For example ,you have to be A bacheler's degree in engineering ,biological sciences,physical science or mathematics from an accredited college or university.

*** Make sure there is a space after each comma, but not before each comma. Change “be” to “have.” The word “bacheler” should be spelled as “bachelor.” Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Replace “you” with pronouns like “a person” or “they.”

Edited sentence: For example, they have to have a bachelor’s degree in engineering, biological sciences, physical science, or mathematics from an accredited college or university.

This shows that you havemtoi study really hard and study a lot to become astronaut.

*** “havemtoi” should be written as “have to.” The phrases “study really hard” and “study a lot” generally have the same meaning, so only one of the phrases is needed. Add “an” before “astronaut.” Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Replace “you” with pronouns like “a person” or “they.”

Edited sentence: This shows that a person has to study really hard to become an astronaut.

*** Make sure there is a space between each sentence. Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view only. Replace “you” with pronouns like “a person” or “they.” “A” does not need to be capitalized in every sentence unless it is at the beginning of a sentence. An “an” should come before words that begin with a vowel sound, like “astronaut.”

Edited paragraph:

There are many requirements to become an astronaut for many reasons. A person has to be a U.S. citizen. For example, this information is from the internet. This means if a person wants to be an astronaut they have to be a U.S. citizen. Also if a person wants to be an astronaut they have to study hard. For example, they have to have a bachelor’s degree in engineering, biological sciences, physical science, or mathematics from an accredited college or university. This shows that a person has to study really hard to become an astronaut.

Edited by Penny Yagake






Both De Blasio and cuomo had different ideas about canceling school and not canceling.De Blasio said he wanted to cancel school for a year.For example in the text it says that "Ney York school buildings will not reopen yhis academy year.'This. shows that De Blasio wants the schools closed. Government Andrew Coumo wants the school closed for many reasons.For example in the text Coumo says that the mayor had been premature in saying the city's more than 1 million public schools will continue remote learning for A year.This shows that Cuomondissagrees with De Blasio.


Both De Blasio and cuomo had different ideas about canceling school and not canceling.

*** At the beginning of a paragraph, you can introduce both people by their full names and titles. Change “canceling school and not canceling” to “canceling school or not canceling school.” Capitalize “Cuomo.”

Edited sentence: Mayor Bill de Blasio and Governor Andrew Cuomo had different ideas about canceling school or not canceling school.

De Blasio said he wanted to cancel school for a year.

*** Good.

For example in the text it says that "Ney York school buildings will not reopen yhis academy year.'

*** Make sure that quotes are written correctly according to the text. “Ney York” should be spelled as “New York City.” “yhis” should be spelled as “this.” “academy” should be written as “academic.” The end quotation mark should be a double quotation mark (“), not a single quotation mark (‘).

Edited sentence: For example in the text it says that “New York City school buildings will not reopen this academic year.”

This. shows that De Blasio wants the schools closed.

*** Remove the first period. “De Blasio” should be written as “de Blasio” unless this name is at the beginning of a sentence.

Edited sentence: This shows that de Blasio wants the schools closed.

Government Andrew Coumo wants the school closed for many reasons.

*** Change “Government” to “Governor.” “Coumo” should be spelled as “Cuomo.”

Edited sentence: Governor Andrew Cuomo wants the schools closed for many reasons.

For example in the text Coumo says that the mayor had been premature in saying the city's more than 1 million public schools will continue remote learning for A year.

*** Put quotation marks around a quote. The “A” should not be capitalized.

Edited sentence: For example in the text Cuomo says that “the mayor had been premature in saying the city's more than 1 million public school students” will continue remote learning for a year.

This shows that Cuomondissagrees with De Blasio.

*** Add a space between “Cuomo” and “disagrees.” Remove the “n” and spell “dissagrees” as “disagrees.”

Edited sentence: This shows that Cuomo disagrees with de Blasio.

*** Make sure there is a space between each sentence. Watch out for spelling errors. Make sure quotes are written correctly according to the text.

Edited paragraph:

Mayor Bill de Blasio and Governor Andrew Cuomo had different ideas about canceling school or not canceling school. De Blasio said he wanted to cancel school for a year. For example in the text it says that “New York City school buildings will not reopen this academic year.” This shows that de Blasio wants the schools closed. Governor Andrew Cuomo wants the schools closed for many reasons. For example in the text Cuomo says that “the mayor had been premature in saying the city's more than 1 million public school students” will continue remote learning for a year. This shows that Cuomo disagrees with de Blasio.

Edited by Penny Yagake









There are many ways that social distancing is negative and positive.One way social distancing is negative is the virus can still spread.For example in the text it says that people can still spread the virus through droplets from coughs and sneezes.This Is bad because even if you practice social distancing you can still get the virus.One way social distancing is positive is less gathering.For example in the text it says that social distancing involves avoiding mass gathering.This is good because you have more chance of not getting the virus.


There are many ways that social distancing is negative and positive.

*** Good.

One way social distancing is negative is the virus can still spread.

*** Good.

For example in the text it says that people can still spread the virus through droplets from coughs and sneezes.

*** Good.

This Is bad because even if you practice social distancing you can still get the virus.

*** Avoid second person point of view — remove “you.” Use third person point of view instead. Replace “you” with words such as “people” or “they.”

Edited sentence: This is bad because even if people practice social distancing they can still get the virus.

One way social distancing is positive is less gathering.

*** Add “that it means” before “less.”

Edited sentence: One way social distancing is positive is that it means less gathering.

For example in the text it says that social distancing involves avoiding mass gathering.

*** Add “s” after “gathering.”

Edited sentence: For example in the text it says that social distancing involves avoiding mass gatherings.

This is good because you have more chance of not getting the virus.

*** Avoid second person point of view — remove “you.” Use third person point of view instead. Add “s” after “chance.”

Edited sentence: This is good because people have more chances of not getting the virus.

*** Add a space after the period at the end of each sentence. Again, avoid second person point of view. Use third person point of view instead. Replace “you” with words such as “people” or “they.”

Edited paragraph:

There are many ways that social distancing is negative and positive. One way social distancing is negative is the virus can still spread. For example in the text it says that people can still spread the virus through droplets from coughs and sneezes. This is bad because even if people practice social distancing they can still get the virus. One way social distancing is positive is that it means less gathering. For example in the text it says that social distancing involves avoiding mass gatherings. This is good because people have more chances of not getting the virus.

Edited by Penny Yagake






I think JK Rowlings new webpage will help children for many reasons.one reason is students will stay educated.For example in the text it says that keep children educated and entertained during the coronavirus pandemic.This show that students will still educated during the pandemic because we are reading a lot of books and learning many new things.Another reason is that children new things .this will help the children because when to go back to school they are still going to be smart.


I think JK Rowlings new webpage will help children for many reasons.

*** Avoid first person point of view — remove “I.” Use third person point of view instead.

Edited sentence: JK Rowling’s new webpage will help children for many reasons.

one reason is students will stay educated.

*** Capitalize the first word in this sentence. Add “that” after “is.”

Edited sentence: One reason is that students will stay educated.

For example in the text it says that keep children educated and entertained during the coronavirus pandemic.

*** Change “that” to “to.” Add a comma after “For example.”

Edited sentence: For example, in the text it says to keep children educated and entertained during the coronavirus pandemic.

This show that students will still educated during the pandemic because we are reading a lot of books and learning many new things.

*** Avoid first person point of view — remove “we.” “show” should be written as “shows.” Add “be” after “still.” Avoid using the word “things” — what are they learning?

Edited sentence: This shows that students will still be educated during the pandemic because they are reading a lot of books and learning new information.

Another reason is that children new things .

*** This sentence is incomplete.

Edited sentence: Another reason is that children learn new information.

this will help the children because when to go back to school they are still going to be smart.

*** Capitalize the first word in this sentence. Change the first “to” to “they.”

Edited sentence: This will help the children because when they go back to school they are still going to be smart.

*** Make sure to capitalize the first word in each sentence. Add a space after the period at the end of each sentence. Only use third person point of view for these paragraphs.

Edited paragraph:

JK Rowling’s new webpage will help children for many reasons. One reason is that students will stay educated. For example, in the text it says to keep children educated and entertained during the coronavirus pandemic. This shows that students will still be educated during the pandemic because they are reading a lot of books and learning new information. Another reason is that children learn new information. This will help the children because when they go back to school they are still going to be smart.

Edited by Penny Yagake






 I would choose jigsaw puzzles and indoor basketball for many reasons I would choose for many reasons. I choose a jigsaw puzzle because it helps you vitual-spitual. It can help you with driving a car,using a map, learning and following dance moves, and a whole host of other things.I choose this because these things can be really useful when I'm big.i choose indoor basketball because it can burn a lot of my calories and become fit instead of becoming fat. Burns calories (an hour 630-750 calories).I choose indoor basketball because  it  gives your whole body exercice  because there is a lot of running,jumping,and I  like playing basketball a lot.

I would choose jigsaw puzzles and indoor basketball for many reasons I would choose for many reasons.

      • The “I would choose for many reasons” at the end of this sentence is not needed. Additionally, do not use first person point of view (“I”). Use third person point of view, which does not use “I.” Also, please restate the prompt, otherwise it is not clear what this paragraph is responding to.

Edited sentence: People could choose jigsaw puzzles and indoor basketball for many reasons.

I choose a jigsaw puzzle because it helps you vitual-spitual.
      • I am not sure what “vitual-spitual” means. Avoid first person point of view (“I”) and second person point of view (“you”). Use third person point of view. Third person point of view names a person, and does not use “I” or “you.”

Edited sentence: People can choose a jigsaw puzzle because it helps them virtually and spiritually.

It can help you with driving a car,using a map, learning and following dance moves, and a whole host of other things.
      • A space after the first comma is needed. Choose either “learning” or “following” because you do not need to include both words. Avoid second person point of view (“you”) and use third person point of view.

Edited sentence: It can help people with driving a car, using a map, learning dance moves, and a whole host of other things.

I choose this because these things can be really useful when I'm big.

      • Avoid using the word “things” and replace it with words that describe what those things are. Avoid first person point of view and use third person point of view.

Edited sentence: People choose this activity because it can be really useful when a person gets older.

i choose indoor basketball because it can burn a lot of my calories and become fit instead of becoming fat.

      • Describe what becomes “fit.” Avoid first person point of view and use third person point of view.

Edited sentence: People choose indoor basketball because it can burn a lot of calories and help them become fit instead of becoming fat.

Burns calories (an hour 630-750 calories).
      • You can combine this sentence with the previous sentence.

Edited sentence: People choose indoor basketball because it can burn a lot of calories (630-750 calories an hour) and help them become fit instead of becoming fat.

I choose indoor basketball because it gives your whole body exercice because there is a lot of running,jumping,and I like playing basketball a lot.

      • Add a space after each comma. “exercice” should be spelled as “exercise.” Avoid first person point of view (“I”) and second person point of view (“you”). Use third person point of view. I would split this sentence into two sentences.

Edited sentence: People choose indoor basketball because it gives the whole body exercise from a lot of running and jumping. Playing basketball is enjoyable.

      • Please restate the prompt in your paragraph. Additionally, please use third person point of view instead of first person point of view ("I") or second person point of view ("you").


Edited paragraph:

People could choose jigsaw puzzles and indoor basketball for many reasons. People can choose a jigsaw puzzle because it helps them virtually and spiritually. It can help people with driving a car, using a map, learning dance moves, and a whole host of other things. People choose this activity because it can be really useful when a person gets older. People choose indoor basketball because it can burn a lot of calories (630-750 calories an hour) and help them become fit instead of becoming fat. People choose indoor basketball because it gives the whole body exercise from a lot of running and jumping. Playing basketball is enjoyable.

Original paragraph:

I would choose jigsaw puzzles and indoor basketball for many reasons I would choose for many reasons. I choose a jigsaw puzzle because it helps you vitual-spitual. It can help you with driving a car,using a map, learning and following dance moves, and a whole host of other things.I choose this because these things can be really useful when I'm big.i choose indoor basketball because it can burn a lot of my calories and become fit instead of becoming fat. Burns calories (an hour 630-750 calories).I choose indoor basketball because it gives your whole body exercice because there is a lot of running,jumping,and I like playing basketball a lot.

Edited by Penny Yagake






Postponing the 2020 Olympics are causing negative situations for many reasons.11,000 athletes participated for the Olympics which is now canceled so its a big headache and heartache for everyone involved. Also, there is lot of money invovled by the organiser which is now their loss .For example in the text it says that The decision to move the multi-billion dollar event next year .This is a negative situation because people are losing money.


Postponing the 2020 Olympics are causing negative situations for many reasons.

*** “Postponing” is a single action, therefore the singular verb “is” should be used instead of “are.”

Edited sentence: Postponing the 2020 Olympics is causing negative situations for many reasons.

11,000 athletes participated for the Olympics which is now canceled so its a big headache and heartache for everyone involved.

*** “for” should be changed to “in.” “its” should be written as “it’s” meaning “it is.”

Edited sentence: 11,000 athletes participated in the Olympics which is now canceled so it’s a big headache and heartache for everyone involved.

Also, there is lot of money invovled by the organiser which is now their loss .

*** Add “a” before “lot.” “invovled” should be spelled as “involved.” Remove the extra space before the period. “by” should be changed to “from.”

Edited sentence: Also, there is a lot of money involved from the organiser which is now their loss.

For example in the text it says that The decision to move the multi-billion dollar event next year .

*** This sentence is incomplete. Part of the quote appears to be missing. Additionally, if there is a quote here, there needs to be quotation marks at the beginning of the quote and at the end of the quote.

Edited sentence: For example in the text it says that “The decision to move the multi-billion dollar event next year.”

This is a negative situation because people are losing money.

*** Good.

*** Please put new paragraphs at the top of your page, not at the bottom. Be sure to check the spelling and word choice in your sentences. Also make sure that quotes are written correctly according to the text.

Edited paragraph:

Postponing the 2020 Olympics is causing negative situations for many reasons. 11,000 athletes participated in the Olympics which is now canceled so it’s a big headache and heartache for everyone involved. Also, there is a lot of money involved from the organiser which is now their loss. For example in the text it says that “The decision to move the multi-billion dollar event next year.” This is a negative situation because people are losing money.

Edited by Penny Yagake